Arnie Shapiro


When I was a youth I felt sorry for the UPS men
They wore patches on their elbows and ass
I don't feel sorry for them anymore
My neighbor is a UPS ass

What If They Don't Wait

Billy says they will wait for you
So you can renounce your sins publicly as Jesus did
He says this near the conclusion of each program of crusade or charade?
Come down from the upper deck of the stadium, from wherever you are
They will wait
The bus driver who brought you
Your wife, your mother, your lover, whomever
They will wait
But what if they don't wait?

The Rhetoric of Healing

Let the healing begin
We must begin the healing its time for healing
And on it goes from the mouths of the politicos
They say time heals all wounds of mice and men
But do the politicos have a magic potion that works in slow mo?

About the Author

Arnie Shapiro was a radio personality at WSUL FM in Monticello from 1979-2004. Prior to that he was on air at WTBQ in Warwick, NY. He also hosted racing from the historic track for the station during grand circuit week and called the races as well. He hosted a show taking listeners inside harness racing called "In the Stretch" and had a column by the same name appearing weekly in Panorama Magazine and the Catskill and Orange Shoppers.

Arnie was also a history teacher, wine and spirits salesman, social worker, welfare fraud investigator, and maitre d' at the famous Fort Westbrook Inn in Westbrookville, NY. He receive his BS and MS from SUNY New Paltz as well as an AA degree from Sullivan County Community College. He also spent one year at NYU (downtown) were he spent more time carousing the village then tending to his studies. He presently is the principal of AMS INVESTIGATIONS, A Process Service And Private Investigation Company. He and his wife Barbara reside in Liberty, NY, but consider Woodstock their home away from home.

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